In 1988, while looking for organizations specifically serving parenting teenage mothers, I was saddened by the realization that very few such organizations existed. There were many organizations serving pregnant teenage mothers. However, after the birth of the child, few resources were available for a teenager who chose to parent her child. How could I, as someone who believed that all life is created by God and, therefore, sacred, ask a pregnant teenager to give her child life and then not offer her encouragement, resources, and practical assistance? This question became an obsession to me. The obsession became a vision, the vision brought together a group of other concerned people, and those people eventually became the organization named Teen Mother Choices, Inc.

Since 1989, Teen Mother Choices has specialized its ministry to serve parenting teenage mothers. We sought God's wisdom, and He provided us with the "Seven Characteristics of a Teenage Mother." These characteristics were part of a research paper done by a woman working towards her Master's Degree in Counseling. They turned out to be just the tool we needed to build the ministry. Once we recognized these characteristics, we began to understand the mindset of these young women and why so many of them choose to parent their children instead of looking to adoption as a solution to their problems.

There are other reasons why a teenage girl gets pregnant and then chooses to parent her child; however, we found these characteristics to be those most prominent among the mothers we serve.

1. A teenage mother will tend to come from a non-intact home.
"My whole life all I have ever wanted was a real family." During a weekend trip with five teenage mothers, all five women individually repeated this one statement. Of all the teenage mothers Teen Mother Choices has served, most have come from single-parent homes. Teen Mother Choices believes that God created human beings to be a part of a family in which both the mother and father are committed to each other and to their children. Therefore, giving young mothers the opportunity to see how solid, Christian families function is one of the best things we can do.

2. A teenage mother will tend to have a close, over-dependent relationship with her mother and a distant or absent relationship with her father.
"If God is the type of Father my dad was, why would I want to have a relationship with Him?" That is how a teenage mother responded when a staff member tried to explain the role of God as her Heavenly Father. As stated in the first characteristic, the majority of teenage girls who find themselves pregnant come from homes absent one parent. They often have volatile relationships with their mothers and no relationships with their fathers. As Christians, we are called to tell others of God the Father's love. Yet, how do we do that when the person listening has no concept of what a good father is? By giving teenage mothers the opportunity to observe intact families, we offer them a glimpse of how God intended His children to live in His family.

3. A teenage mother's pregnancy was probably not an accident, nor was it a conscious choice.
"I had no idea what I was going to do after high school. Then I got pregnant and got my answer: I'll be a mom!" Teenage girls who find themselves pregnant often have no plan for the future. They also have never contemplated what special gifts and talents God has placed within them. Therefore, they often believe that there is nothing special about them, so getting pregnant is something that "just happened." Spending one-on-one time with a teenage mother gives us a chance to find out what makes her special. Once we recognize the gifts and talents she possesses, we can encourage her to utilize them.

4. A teenage mother will be determined to keep her child.
According to 1997 statistics, less than 4% of all pregnant teenagers place their children for adoption. Why is that? A teenage mother involved with Teen Mother Choices once made this statement, "Getting pregnant was the price I was willing to pay to feel connected to someone for a few minutes. Parenting my child is the price I am willing to pay to feel connected to someone for 18 years."

Teenage mothers desperately want to feel an attachment to someone. By being attached or connected to someone, a teenage mother finds worth and value. The need to feel connected stems from the desire within each of us to be connected to our Creator. Consequently, if the person teenage mothers truly want to connect with is Jesus Christ, we must first allow them to become connected with us as fellow human beings before we introduce them to their Creator.

5. A teenage mother often feels a sense of worth and accomplishment because she had a baby.
"I can't do anything else, but I sure do give birth to babies good!" As stated above, teenage mothers often have no goals for the future. They often feel as though they cannot accomplish anything. Once a teenager has a baby, she has now accomplished something. In other words, her child becomes a kind of trophy, not a separate individual, but rather an extension of herself.
By offering a teenage mother opportunities through vocational and personality testing, we can assist her in investigating what special gifts and talents God has given her. This helps her realize her own uniqueness and allows her to begin attaining her own accomplishments.

6. A teenage mother will often have unclear expectations of her child.
"I know that my baby will be potty trained by the time she's a year old. When she was 4 months old, she already knew when she needed a new diaper!" If a teenage mother perceives that her child is an extension of herself, is it not typical for her to expect her child to do things only an older child can do? By providing her with information on child development and introducing her to child experts, you enable a teenage mother to understand her child's growth and maturity better.

7. A teenage mother will experience great mood swings.
"Who am I? I'm not a regular teenager and I'm not a regular mom. I'm so confused!" While most teenage girls experience mood swings, parenting teenagers seem to experience them more intensely. This is due, in part, to the fact that they are forced to play so many different life roles at such a young age. At any given moment she is a teenager, a mother, a student, an employee, and most importantly, a person in need of Jesus Christ. By offering her resources that address all five of her major life roles, we convey to her that God is concerned with every part of her life.
In the past eleven years, Teen Mother Choices has grown to rely upon these seven characteristics. They have helped us to understand that parenting teenage mothers are a complex people group. These characteristics have also shown us that teenage mothers come to us with very specific needs.

In 1988, I wondered how I could ask a pregnant teenage girl to give birth and then not offer her assistance once the child was born. God provided the answer to my question by showing me that life, in all of its stages, is created by Him and sacred to Him. By serving parenting teenage mothers, those of us within the Pro-Life movement have the opportunity to communicate to the world around us that God the Creator loves His creation and desires to give His children abundant life.
Jesus said, "I came that they might have life and have it to the full." John 10:10